OH! WE'RE GOING TO IKEA...

Actually, we already went to Ikea. We went to Ikea last night, for to buy cute little baby related things and a changing table. Look at the cuteness! Look at it!

Ok, ok, so I was bored. This is actually a little montage type thing I put together for Lou-Bee to demonstrate the cuteness, but I thought that you could benefit from it too.

Don't you even think about telling me you didn't benefit from the cuteness. That's right, just sit down and put your hands where I can see them.

(Just to clarify, we bought everything apart from the baby rabbit. We didn't buy a baby rabbit. I don't know what to think...my sister actually felt that she had to check this with me...)

MAD PEOPLE ON MSN

Why do people insist on talking to me about the problems in their lives, when I haven't actually had any contact with them in months and months? I don't mind helping people through hard times (yes, I'll even help internet-people who I've never met)...but I don't appreciate when people sign in, say "Hi, how are you?", read my generic non-response of "Pretty good, hope you're ok too" and then go off on one about self-harming friends and eating disorder difficulties.

People! Realise that when I say "I'm pretty good" to someone who I don't know and haven't spoken to in months, this could as easily mean "everything is doomed, doomed, bad and doomed" as it could "everything is just peachy and I'm happy like Ned Flanders"...so therefore bear this in mind before unburdening yourself in my general direction.

The problem with some people is that you can't actually just say "when I said 'pretty good' I meant 'not great' so I can't offer you the sort of support you're looking for right now" because there's too high a chance that they'll be in the bathroom cabinet looking for a razor blade before you know what's happening. So you just have to try to be polite and deal with it.

Maybe I'm too weak.

Maybe I shouldn't leave people who I haven't spoken to in ages on my msn contacts.

Maybe I should stop speculating upon banal and insignificant things in this diary and should just get on with making decisions and living life and stuff like that.

BABY SHOWER SOON!!!

Ohh, we're having a baby shower on the 1st April*. Ohh, I've set up an online gift registry. Can you imagine how great it is to trawl through internet shops (mothercare and toys r us), adding things to the "LIST OF THINGS WE WOULD LIKE PEOPLE TO BUY FOR US". It's an amazing experience, I'd recommend you try it. Ooh, the grabby materialism of it all.

*We're having it in the afternoon. We ain't fools!

BASTARD THING...

Oops, my computer just threw a flid and posted this without me even clicking anything. Possessed machine. Creepy machine. Damned machine - now I have to complete the rest of the entry using the buggery html majiggy, which is incredibly annoying and fiddly and doesn't look nearly as nice to type.

MMM...CRUNCHY...

I keep getting nosebleeds. Nosebleeds that don't actually come out of my nose - they happen in my sinuses and the first I know about it is when I blow my nose and lots of blood comes out, sometimes followed by a little trickle. This happened for the first time a few days ago and since then my nostrils have felt all crunchy and disgusting. I know that this is way too much information, but apparently this is yet another charming pregnancy symptom, so I thought it was necessary to share. Necessary because all the mothers out there will no doubt sympathise, necessary because all the non-mothers can use this information as a good motivation for contraception, necessary because this forms part of my campaign to stop people from saying "aww, it's a beautiful time" to pregnant women.

Beautiful time my arse is it. I received a baby magazine from Toys R Us yesterday and it was all pink and fluffy**, filled with "it's a beautiful time" type cliches. Hmm. One article was about how being pregnant doesn't mean you can't feel sexy. Of course not. I put my case to Alex:
"Well, I suppose what with having something the size of a basketball hanging of the front of me, stretch marks on my boobs, increased vaginal discharge, threatening piles, constipation and heartburn...why wouldn't I feel sexy??"

Seriously, so far every woman I've spoken to who is or has been pregnant has laughed in a cynical sort of fashion at the words "it's a beautiful time". Just don't say it.

**metaphorical pink and fluffy, not actually pink and fluffy

THE CATS ARE INSANE, AND IT'S CATCHING.

I had a bath earlier, so of course Carrott had to indulge his ritual of jumping up and dipping his feet in the water while I was in the bath, then waiting while the water ran out of the bath, then sitting calmly inside the empty bathtub for half an hour once the water has drained. I sent a photograph to Louisa earlier demonstrating the obscure sight that greeted me when I went in the bathroom about 20 minutes after the water had drained this morning (a photograph which she has very kindly agreed to put onto ye olde 'puter and email to me so that I can post it here...let's all hug Lou).

Both cats, sat calmly in the bath, amongst the bubbles.

They're so weird.

(When Lou sends the photo to me I shall indeed post in on here. Post-haste, no less.)

Ok, my sister got impatient in the middle of an msn conversation and demanded that I let her upload the picture RIGHT NOW. Amy - she can be damned scary. So here's the pic:

TO BATH OR NOT TO BATH...THAT IS THE QUESTION...

Do you think it's a bad idea to have two baths in a day, when you know you've got to have a shower before bed to wash your hair anyway? Is this getting into the realms of OCD madness again? Bollocks to it, I'm going to have another one, it makes me happy. And clean!

IT'S LIKE SOMETHING OUT OF ALIEN. PLEASE DON'T TRY TO KILL THE MOTHER.

I'LL PUT ON THE RABBIT COSTUME AGAIN IF IT'LL MAKE YOU HUG ME...


give Kate-Lee more *HUGS*Get hugs of your own