I'm confused as to what feeling would make David Hasselhoff dress like a bear, dance with some little dogs, carry a fish in his mouth or fly through the air with the greatest of ease, but I'm guessing he's probably in love. He certainly seems happy. Seriously, you need to look at this - it's amazing. Though you should probably be aware that you may wet yourself with excitement and/or laughter. THE HOFF, AT HIS VERY BEST.

FOR TIPS ON HOW TO MODIFY YOUR EXERCISE ROUTINE...

Hmm. This pregnancy company seems to think that all pregnant women are dull and sensible, following the 'pregnancy diet' (more health-food and wholegrain things than you could shake a stick at) and exercising like demons. They assume that we're all getting into a panic now that we're becoming so big that exercise becomes difficult. "You're getting bigger by the minute, but that's no reason to stop exercising"...oh, bugger off.

Alex feels that my exercise regime may need a touch of 'modification', as my usual routine of:
-- Roll sideways off sofa (yoga style stretches involved)
-- Walk to kitchen (aerobic)
-- Open fridge (co-ordination, pulling action)
-- Pick up Creme Egg (lifting - muscle building)
-- Close fridge, walk back to front room, flop heavily onto sofa (some great gymnastic actions there...)
-- Unwrap creme egg
-- Eat creme egg
-- Throw tinfoil for cats to chase
...probably isn't what the hyper energetic 'Baby Center' people had in mind.

Oh, and they can bugger off with their irritating health tips too: "If you're craving chocolate have fat-free hot cocoa made with nonfat milk. Or make some trail mix with raisins, dried fruits, nuts, and just a small handful of chocolate chips." Hmm.

MISREADING OF THINGS AGAIN

I was looking through the sale brochure for Wickes earlier (yes, yes, it's very sad) and misread 'Interior Doors' as 'Inferior Doors'. I giggled and said "well, of course they're cheap", causing Alex to look at me in that way that he does so well.

FOOTBALL NOISE...BACK OF THE NET, OH YES

Does anyone else have a problem with football commentary? I can't listen to it. It's just noise. It's like being in a room full of old people who insist on talking to you about lots of people you don't know and are never likely to meet. What do I care if some bloke called 'Mussey' has hurt his knee? And they make such banal and obvious comments, such as "If that goal had gone in we might have seen a completely different result today". Well...yes.

I should be allowed to provide football commentary, especially for England matches. My cries of "what are you doing, you donkeys!??" (followed by sporadic donkey-hoof sound effects for the rest of the game) would no doubt go down a storm. Plus my habit of picking out the physical characteristics of the players in order to tell them apart may not be entirely politically correct, but at least it's interesting.

Right, that's it now. It's already 4.30 and I haven't had my nap...I'm writing a pile of gibberish ("all hail the land of Gibber!") and need to lie down. But Alex is painting the bathroom again and is therefore listening to football noise.

Expect me to be back later with an attitude of rage and grumpiness and some impressive twitching around the eye region.

I REQUIRE MORE HUGS...

*HUGS* TOTAL! give Kate-Lee more *HUGS*
Get hugs of your own